There are plenty of books that warn you about the mishaps that occur during pregnancy. There are some things though, that no book can prepare you for. That said, I have LOVED being pregnant. It is one of the most joyful experiences of my life. However, some of the things that have occurred are downright hilarious. See if you agree...
- Loss of hair-Most books tell you that your hair will become more voluminous. Yes, the hair on my HEAD did. The hair on my right arm, FELL OUT! I have a bald spot on my arm! Seriously? How does that happen?
- Stretch dots-I'm so glad I didn't tell my doctor about this one, he would have laughed me out of the office. We all know what stretch marks look like, but, what you may not know is what they look like before they become full blown stretch marks. They look like little purple dots on your belly! Imagine waking up to find spots all over your stomach! Yeah, a little unnerving until you come to terms with what will surely follow them.
- Varicose Veins-I knew that there was a chance that my varicose veins would worsen when I became pregnant. Fine. A small price to pay for my son. What I didn't know is that when I told my doctor about them, he would tell my to buy compression stockings. For real? Have you ever seen those things?!
- Dry Skin-My chin has looked like its about peel off for several months now and NO amount of moisturizer seems to cure it.
- Itchy spot-I have been itchy all throughout pregnancy. However, I have a spot on my left shoulder blade that itches CONSTANTLY. I find myself finding bookshelf corners and and rulers at school to scratch with and whenever I get wiggly, my husband knows to scratch "the spot".
- Pregnesia-I can't take credit for this name, my friend Andrea says that I have this condition. Symptoms of this condition include: Putting frozen waffles in the refrigerator/cabinet, putting milk in the cereal cabinet, losing your keys/cell phone daily, forgetting appointments/daily job requirements, forgetting names, repeating yourself, saying totally and ridiculously stupid things at work, forgetting how to get home, leaving your keys in the door for hours, leaving your mail outside on the grill in the rain, and basically the list is endless.
- Water Works-If crying on command were a valuable skill, I would be a highly sought after teacher. However, it's not, and boy is it embarrassing when you break out the water works at totally inappropriate times, I probably cry at work at least twice a week, during church, during commercials, at bed time, whenever I step into Fisher's room, whenever I talk about Fisher, in the grocery store, and in almost any conversation that involves babies. They tell you that you'll be emotional, that doesn't even begin to cover it.
- Nesting-We've all heard of nesting and feeling the urge to clean and prepare for baby. I have these tendencies, not as often as I would like, but I do. However, what they don't tell you about nesting is that you'll have the urge to throw away useful and perfectly good items. My husband has gone through the trash lately to find half eaten loaves of bread and salad dressings. In my classroom, I will throw away anything that isn't taped or pinned down. Basically I have a HUGE aversion to junk and clutter.
Pregnancy is a glorious and beautiful time. It is also scary and somewhat overwhelming. The side effects listed above are not my complaints about pregnancy, just a few things that, umm, surprised me. I know every woman has a list that could rival this one.
